I don’t know about you, but there are times when I feel like I just can’t face anybody. And, I mean any body.
So if you don’t mind, I’ll scoot under a down comforter, dial-up a time out, and disappear for a week or two, ok?
Thanks …
Sometimes, this strain of ‘spirt-snap’ spits out a scenario like this. “I’m heading out into the open air of my day. Slipping on a jacket, shades and a Covid mask. Layering my armor in the event of a chance encounter with any free-floating dementors.”
Right … :)
On other occasions, this ‘drive to hide’ shows up more abstractly. Perhaps some emotional heavy-weather has blown in. And, right quick, Self-Doubt steps up to take over the wheel.
Not an auspicious beginning for any road trip …
If you listen closely, you may notice a perceptible rhythm.
Remember that catchy Paul Simon lyric from Graceland?
♪I know what I know …♪
Only now, we’re singing it, ♪ I don’t know what I know ♪.
Our self-confidence has skipped town without notice, stripping the ground from beneath our feet.
And with confusion swingin’ around like a pinata, it’s plenty tough to get a good whack at some mental clarity.
So we hunker down …
This is Duck and Cover time, folks.
Duck: rapid deflection away from falling objects
Cover: defense against body blows to head, heart or gut
We give it our best shot in promoting the interest of our security. Making a reservation for self-preservation.
“Book me a table for one, please. Away from the bathrooms and any large plate-glass windows”.
But, Duck & Cover has its own limitations. As we’re taking measures against trauma, we are also generating it.
I mean, try asking yourself: what does this feel like? Huddling alone in that bunker, in the middle of a war zone in your head?
We’re hiding away, yes. Locked-in with our feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. But, we’re also sheltering from our Light.
That private little hell we’re enduring applies just the right amount of pressure needed to crack us open …
There is a crack, a crack in everything,
Leonard Cohen
That’s how the light gets in.
And, wouldn’t you know it? (You tell us, brother Steven …)
The process of growth … is the art of falling down. Measured by the gentleness and awareness with which we pick ourselves up … the openness with which we continue and take the next unknown step, beyond our edge … into the remarkable mystery of being.
Steven Levine
So you draw in a deep breath. Removing your sunglasses and mask.
You take that next step.
Noticing, with a smile, that it is a dance step …
Yes, in my hiding places I might pause, notice mystery of being and with a smile or not, take a breath in with “I” and breathe out with “am”. For your exquisite, spicy humor and kick ass tunes and dance step, thank you, thank you, thank you!
Thank you so much for your poetic comment and for your appreciation of this blog post “from the inside”. Sending love <3