Did you know that the hard moment you just experienced with your friend was an opportunity for more love?
What appeared to be contention – a bit of knocking about – has opened access to an expanded possibility.
Perhaps things didn’t end well.
But a new field has been cleared. Old limitations surpassed. As the two of you tend your growing garden.
The scene that just played out was choreographed by a Scriptwriter you may or may not know.
But let’s try a do-over. Start a conversation about the conversation.
You invite your friend to meet you in the field ‘’beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing’’. *
Extending your hand in friendship and speaking the truth of your experience.
Keeping it real.
You take hold of that deep heart-space within you that knows no blame.
“I know you didn’t mean to hurt me. Yet, the energy of delivery in your communication felt like a barb to my heart.
You spoke from your pain. I understand. And I want you to know that what you thought happened, did not happen. I had done exactly what you’d asked me to do. Willingly, and with pleasure.”
Your friend tells you that she’s embarrassed. Feels ashamed. She acknowledges that she’d jumped to a conclusion and blamed you for it.
You tell her you love her – and that you’re comforted the two of you can share so honestly together.
You affirm that she did nothing wrong – that the vignette played out exactly as intended.
It is all okay. More than ok, because it offered an opening to experience more love, one to the other.
Successful outcomes like this make an abiding impact as ‘energetic touchstones’. They bolster our capacity to move forward with confidence that even the hard stuff can be met with kindness. And mended.
A new personal strength emerges. With collective implications.
… a time to reach out to others, to share and build understanding, to break down boundaries, to bury our hatred and let our strong innate desire for love and peace rise up.
Lorna Byrne
We can do this.
Exchanging like-for-like when it comes to sharp edges never worked — except to build upon individual and group mistrust.
The satisfaction gained from taking the high road is its own reward – even if unrequited. And always tips the global balance in favor of more love … “than age or time could ever destroy”. (Smokey Robinson)
Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination …
Maya Angelou
Close your eyes, fall in love, stay there.
Rumi
*Rumi